A Year Has Passed

It’s been a year now. Over a year since I lost part of my heart. My father, who I was close too, despite not having seen him in person for over a decade, passed. He was always a model for health, on the outside. He wooed people with his seemingly ageless exterior, until it faded away.

It’s hard to fathom that his physical presence isn’t here. He was supposed to be here longer. He was going to live a long life. So we all thought. I cannot say that I am not heartbroken still over his passing. I have accepted it as reality and I’m not delusional about it. Deep inside the veins inside my heart, it still hurts. A lot. I’m not one to put on a façade. I feel it’s ok though. People get too much into fakeness and fake their way through grief and mourning. Until they can’t. You can’t hide from the power of losing a person you were deeply connected too who you also happen to share DNA from. At some point, it will come out and rear its ugly head, unless you make a choice.

You can choose to be ok with showing your grief and acknowledging it still hurts. I have chosen this route. I do not want to be weighed down by unresolved sorrow that I didn’t fully deal with, appearing later on in life in an insidious way inside my body.

I am sure my father is at peace. I know that our connection lives on through eternity. So, I say to anyone who has lost a parent you were close to, it’s ok to be sad. It’s ok to cry and grieve. You can never forget the person even as you live your life. It’s ok. We learn to live without their physical presence, but their DNA lives on inside our hearts, soul, spirit, psyche, mind. Don’t be afraid to be true to who you are and take your time to grieve even as the world will tell you to move on. You do you. This is what I wish to share and I hope it can help someone.